Okay, March is the WORST month and probably will be for the rest of my life. I think about 2 years ago on March the 1st. We were blessing our sweet baby boy at church. Wow, was he a BIG boy that day. I think Grandma Stafford took the 9 mth outfit back and bought the 12mth just so it would button around his neck. Man, I miss that sweet neck and his smell. I miss EVERYTHING about him. They way he loved me, no one will ever love you the way your children do. I just miss his love everyday. Amy and I went and put flowers on his grave last week, would you have ever thought black daisies and white tulips would be so pretty. Well, they are. Everything about him was perfect. I feel very alone in this world without him. You ever get that feeling when you leave home like you have forgotten something...I have that feeling ALL THE TIME. I am never fully complete. March is just a reminder of what has happened to us.
On a brighter note, I think sometimes that he isnt here, well the last couple of days have proven me wrong. It has been very quiet in my house the last couple of days...I have been on the sofa or in the bed. I hear all sorts of things, the gate coming open at the top of the stairs, little feet running down the hallway, and a quiet voice. He's here, he hasn't left his mother, I just haven't been listening.
Of course he is here, Lisa!! OF COURSE HE IS! Don't forget that. Perhaps a broken foot is a blessing in this difficult month to stop and listen. He wouldn't leave his momma, and he's got to watch over his Catie!
ReplyDeleteYou would not even believe the things I have heard the past couple of days...It's amazing....
ReplyDelete